4 Mom Mindset Shifts THAT WILL Help You Crush Overwhelm

You’ve decided that it’s time to get organized. It’s time to take charge of your home and life.

Perhaps you’ve got a vision of what you want your life and house to look like. For example, you want life to be balanced, happy, and successful.

And your home to be organized, decluttered, and tidy

Or maybe you have a list of habits you want to change. Like:

• Wake up early
• Exercise regularly,
• Keep up with laundry
• Read more
• Learn a new skill

Because when it comes to changing our life, our first impulse is often to change what we DO. 

And while that’s certainly important, the truth is that changing what we THINK can go a long way to helping us build the organized, happy, and healthy life we so desperately want. 

In fact, changing how we think can make it a million times easier to build the habits and life we want. 

Your mindset determines how you feel, how you spend your time, and can make all the difference in creating the life you want. 

4 Mom Mindset Shifts To Help You Crush Overwhelm

In this post, I’m going to lay out 4 common mom mindsets or thoughts that are making you overwhelmed and keeping you from your goals.

And then I’ll give you the simple mindset changes that will help you get organized, crush your to-do list, and achieve your goals. 

Let’s get started!

#1 Mindset to Ditch: “I Need to Change Everything Right Now”

When we decide that our life needs a change, it’s very easy to fall into the trap of thinking you need to change all things…

…and do it all at once. 

Like when you look around and see dirty dishes spilling out of the sink, and all surfaces covered with mess, and laundry piles throughout your home, it’s easy to feel like you’ve got to:

• Declutter your whole house (like yesterday)
• Start a whole new cleaning routine
• Make your kids do chores (I’m not your maid!)

…And you’ve got to do it all RIGHT NOW.

Or when you find you can’t climb the stairs without getting out of breath and so you decide that you need to change everything about your diet, replace everything in your fridge and pantry, and start exercising 6 days a week.

…And you’ve got to do it all RIGHT NOW.

And so you try to make big ol’ changes. You do okay for a week or two until you throw in the towel because you’re overwhelmed and exhausted. 

While feeling like you need to change everything right now this is a natural tendency for many moms… 

(raising my hand!)

…the truth is that this mindset leads to burnout.

And burnout makes making lasting change practically impossible. 

Not to mention it makes you feel like a failure when you inevitably fall short of changing your entire life in one foul swoop.

Instead…

Shift to: “A Small change is enough.”

Back when I was an overwhelmed working mom to 4 tiny kids, just trying to get to the end of each day without sobbing in a locked bathroom while my kids bang on the door demanding snacks…

I came across a quote that changed my whole life. Here it is: 

“A small daily task, if be really daily, will beat the labours of a spasmodic Hercules (Anthony Trollope).”

Translation: If you just do a little everyday, it’ll beat a huge, but sporadic effort. 

And when I read it, it hit me so hard because I was the reigning champion of huge, but sporadic efforts. 

Every few months, like clockwork, I’d do the same thing:

I’d look around at the piles of laundry, toys, and general chaos and declare to anyone in earshot that “Things are gonna be different around here!” 

Then after 3 days of scrubbing, vacuuming, snapping at my family, and filling bags full of stuff to donate I’d plop on the couch exhausted, but deeply satisfied by my work. 

But a week later, my house would look like the wreck it was before my explosive cleaning session.

That was my world. Until I read that quote. 

Which said I could just do a little everyday and it’d be waaay better than my exhausting semi-regular cleaning sessions.

I was especially convinced there was something to this thing when I learned more about the guy who said it, 19th century novelist Anthony Trollope. 

Because he lived it.

Every morning, he’d sit at his desk and write for a couple hours before going to his full time job at the post office. 

He wrote at least 32 books WHILE WORKING FULL TIME. Just writing a little every single day.

*cue my mind exploding*

And when I applied this to my life, from cleaning my house to tackling my daily to-do list…

…I found I was more productive and my house was waaay tidier even though I spent less time working on it. 

So instead of feeling like you have to change everything, shift to being okay with small, consistent changes. 

Whether it’s…

• cleaning up as a family before bedtime
• exercising
•  Staying up on laundry 
• Reading to your kid

Start small. Just a few minutes a day. 

And you’ll be amazed at what you start to accomplish!

Free 30 Day Habit Tracker Printable to Conquer Your Goals

#2 Mindset to Ditch: “I Should Be Doing As Much as Possible”

As busy moms, it’s very easy to feel like we should be doing All. The. Things. 

Mostly because, let’s face it, all the things are in front of us begging to get done. So much falls on our very tired shoulders. It can be hard not to feel like our goal should be to do absolutely everything we can.

But the truth is that not everything is of equal importance. And some things aren’t really even worth doing. 

Instead, I invite you to shift your mindset to…

Ask Yourself: “What are the most important things I can be doing?”

There’s this thing called the Pareto Principle that has been applied to about a million things. 

Basically, the Pareto Principle is the observation that about 80% of the consequences (outcomes) come from 20% of the causes. 

Which means basically, that 80% of the results that actually help you get organized, get things done, and feel happy, comes from about 20% of the stuff you’re spending your time on.

So your goals shouldn’t be to fit as many things into your day as possible. It’s to figure out what that 20% is in your life. 

Not all things are created equal and let’s face it: you have VERY limited time on your hands. You can’t do it all. So it’s important that you prioritize the most important stuff. 

Therefore, your goal is to shift from a “Let’s see how much I can cram into my day” to “what small tasks are going to help me the most?”

Some examples:

• Establishing a simple Laundry Routine that helps you easily stay up on laundry. 
• Following a cleaning schedule that keeps you home clean with minimal effort
• Morning routine that helps you start the day energized & happy
• Build exercise into your daily routine so you feel good, sleep better, and have more energy

You don’t have to do everything to build an amazing and organized life. It’s about doing the right things. 

#3 Mindset to Ditch: “I Have to Be Perfect at ______”

Whether you identify as a perfectionist or not, the truth is that you may still feel like you have to do things perfectly or else you’re falling short. 

For example, imagine you’re trying to build a new habit or routine. Whether waking up at a new time, exercising daily, limiting social media use, doing laundry each day etc. 

While you go strong for a bit, you fall off the wagon a week in, and suddenly you feel like a complete failure. And then you give up on whatever it is you fell short on.

Thinking you have to do something perfectly or be 100% and a new habit is a surefire recipe to feel terrible. 

Instead…

Shift to: “75% success is AMAZING.”

Instead of shooting for the impossible 100% of whatever it is you’re trying to do, shift to trying to do it at 75%. 

For example, if you’re trying to do better at keeping your house clean, stick to your weekly cleaning routine 75% of the time. Or getting done 3/4 of the things on your list.

Or if you’re trying to workout more and you set the goal to workout 4 times a week, you should feel good if you do it 3 times a week (75%).

Done is Better than Perfect (So Lower Your Standards & Keep Going)

Basically, if you think about academic grades, you’re shooting for a C. Maybe a B. 

While you may be expecting “A” work from yourself, this isn’t school. Getting a “C” on your daily to-do list, your cleaning efforts, or workouts is actually pretty dang amazing.

Because here’s the thing: as you consistently are achieving your goals/expectations 70-80% of the time and NOT throwing in the towel when you fall short of perfection, you’ll find you start making real progress on crushing your goals.

And once you start building new habits and routines, it’ll become easy to stick to them at 80% or 90%…or even 100%. 

And then it may be time for a new goal!

Bottom line: Skip perfection and shoot for around 75% success consistently.

For more on this, check out Done is Better than Perfect (So Lower Your Standards and Keep Going). 

#4 Mindset to Ditch: “I just don’t deserve/have time to take care of myself”

We know we feel better when we are taking care of ourselves by relaxing, exercising, making time for enriching hobbies or even just getting enough sleep…

…but it’s super easy to either feel guilty about taking time for yourself or that you simply do not have the time.

Perhaps you feel that you either have to “earn” self-care or that taking time for yourself takes away from taking care of the others in your life.

Or that with all your responsibilities, you simply do not have the time in your jam-packed day to do something as extravagant as read a book you enjoy for 15 minutes, take a bath, or do some yoga. 

But you don’t have to earn self-care. Because you exist, you deserve self-care. Plain and simple. Self-care is not selfish.  

As writer and activist Audre Lorde put it: “Caring for myself is not self-indulgence, it is self-preservation…” 

Nothing can replace YOU. So taking care of yourself isn’t selfish. It’s survival. It’s smart. And it’s certainly not something you have to “earn”. 

And making time to take care of yourself will ultimately save you time. Because you are more efficient and effective when you feel your best. 

Plus, you’re so much better equipped to not only handle the challenges that come your way, but also show up for the people you love. 

So instead of having the mindset that you don’t have time or have to earn self care…

The Mom Morning Routine to Start Your Day Happy & Energized

Shift to: “Self-care is essential.”

And fitting in self-care can absolutely work for you, no matter how much you have on your plate. The key is to prioritize it. 

I recommend the following 3 tips:

1. Keep it small and doable
2. Schedule the time when you’ll do it. Leaving it to chance or when you “find time” means it won’t happen. Because the day tends to be packed full of kids, work, and a million other things, Morning and bedtime routines are great times to build in some self care. 
3. Track it (you can grab the habit tracker here, or you’ll also find it in the WB) 

For help building self care into your routine, check out the following posts:

• 3 Essentials to Creating a Relaxing Self Care Routine for Moms
• The Mom Morning Routine to Start Your Day Happy & Energized
• The Perfect Bedtime Routine for Moms to Relax and Sleep Well

Mom Mindset SHifts THat WIll Change Your Life

Replacing your unhelpful or negative thoughts will help you get organized, crush your to-do list, and achieve your goals. You can change your life by replacing destructive thoughts with the following”

• “A little change is enough.”
• “What are the most important things I can be doing?”
• “75% success is AMAZING.”
• “Self care is essential.”

So where will you start?